So often we find ourselves feeling less than happy. We may be thinking of something that is no longer happening (interaction with another person that went poorly, telling self how self is not good enough, etc) or hasn’t happened yet (have to go to work on Monday, have to do something I don’t like, I’ll fail the test, etc). We are in the habit of unhappiness. Just like any habit no longer desired, it can be difficult to change but possible with a little preparation and attention.
Step One Plan Ahead
Think of three things that make you truly happy. The kind of happy that is pure and unwavering. The warm sun on your face, riding your bike with the wind in your hair, petting your loving dog or cat. When you think of these things make sure you are ecstatic without any reservation. For example, you love your children or your partner but sometimes they annoy you or you love chocolate cake but feel guilty thinking of it because of the calories. These would not be good things to think about.
Step Two Notice
Notice when you are in a mood other than happy, joyful, peaceful. So many times we don’t even realize we are feeling poorly. When we don’t know we can’t change it. When you become aware of your feeling, ask yourself if you want to change it. If so, go to step three. If not, then you are aware and empowered to make that choice.
Step Three Remind Yourself of Your Happy Thoughts
Distract yourself from the negative thoughts you want to change and remember your happy ideas from step one. You could tell yourself, “That is right, I have the habit of thinking these thoughts but now I am going to think about happy thoughts.” Begin thinking of the amazing thoughts you planned in step one. After you have taken this nice happy break, carry on with your day.
Step Four Recap the Positives in Your Day
Before going to sleep remind yourself of all the positive things (events or feelings) that happened throughout the day. This is fun to do with other people, like your kids or significant other or friends, too. Overtime you will notice your habit of happy getting stronger.